How do you deal with your ex when you live in a small town?

I've been divorced from my cheating ex-husband a few months.


We both live in the same town (my hometown), and I have no plan of moving away since I grew up here and have a stable job that is great here.


He lives with the girl he left me for (less then a year and a half ago), not too far from my home.


However, since we live in a small town... it's getting hard on me. Apparently his girlfriend saw my car at the local hospital the other day. He called me yesterday and asked if something was wrong with our son. I told him our son was at daycare, and that if something would had been wrong, he would had been notified, but that I wasn't at the hospital with our child.


Then he started asking me why I was there, what was wrong, etc. I told him it was none of his business, but he kept insisting.


How can I deal with my ex if we live in such a small town that whenever I go to the doctor, or at the hospital, someone tells him?





My health is none of his business, right? I'm not deadly ill, and had gone for a routine eye exam with my opthalmologist (eye disease run in our family, so I have to get checked yearly...).





He thought I had gone to the OB-GYN clinic, that I was pregnant, etc etc.. even if it would had been, it's none of his business, right?





I feel watched everywhere I go. I feel like I can't go shopping without him throwing a fit because ';he has to pay child support, yet I can go out and buy myself some clothes (mind you, he pays 200$-month, childcare alone is over 600.. I take care of all expenses, and do have a little extra left at the end of the month...and really needed work clothes the other day as mine was 2 sizes too big!!! (droppped lot of weight the past 2 years)...)';... Even though we're divorced, seems like I;m not really ';free';.





Any tips,tricks, or ideas, on how to deal with your ex, and boundaries, when you live in a small town? I tried the ';telling him it's none of his business'; and he doesn't get the message...since we have a child together (of which I have sole legal and physical custody), he thinks my life should be an open book to him.How do you deal with your ex when you live in a small town?
No it is not really any of his business what you do. In small towns gossip gets around fast. I like the thought of giving them something to talk about. Something that wold make them feel stupid when they find out it's not true type of thing.How do you deal with your ex when you live in a small town?
Move or learn to get along.
Your ex needs to mind his own business..tell him that..don't let this bother you..sounds like he is into control issues..
Slow down! I know you live in a small town but, I would assume, that you do not want to move. And, I also assume - something you stated in your question - the your ex does not want to move. On top of that I do not think anything wrong with his call. As a matter of fact, I am surprised that he cares.





So carry on your life and, if he should call, think of it as a call from a man who still has some feelings. Check out my source and find out what relationships are all about.
Well it just like a child. If he knows that you will eventually give into him then he will continue until you do. He wins.





Child support doesn't mean that you are poor and need assistance to raise your child. Child support is shared responsibility for the financial burden of raising a child. I have custody of my 3 kids and its been 4 years and I have only seen 250 bucks in child support. I can do it without it but it would make things easier if I had it. Go buy you some clothes.





You could put a restraining order on him for harassment maybe?
Oh dear. Unfortunately I don't know that it's something you can really escape from. I understand that when his new girlfriend saw your car at the hospital, her and your ex's immediate reaction would be your son. However, once you told them it didn't have to do with him... they should have dropped it.





I think you might just have to suffer through this crap and hope that it slows down eventually.
Nobody can take advantage of you without your permission. If he keeps insisting after you have made your point, hang up. Then don't answer the phone. He WILL get the point eventually. Just don't start a yelling match. He will turn it against you. Good luck.
It's early days after your divorce and your ex husband might eventually calm down. If he doesn't, consider getting him done for harassment. He shouldn't be talking to you unless it's about your son.





I agree that he shouldn't have to drive you out of the place you have lived all your life.
He needs to mind his own business. A piece of him obviously is still attached to you, your life is really none of his business anymore, apart from your child. There are certain boundaries between exes and he needs to understand that he made his choice to leave you, and he needs to leave you alone. A truly mature man would not be invading your space after HE HIMSELF, left you for another woman.





You need to firmly explain his boundries to him, he has gone too far.
well i am not married and never been divorced ether but i can say is that you are ok nothing is wrong and/or call the police and tell them that he wont leave you alone and if he still bothering you tell the court you want a restraining order so he will leave you alone.